Tuesday, 9 September 2014

It Woz Me Wot Won It!

It Woz Me Wot Won It! 

Genuinely. Karl Rove is a political virtuoso. 

His Plan A was to fortify the Evangelical Christians by offering to synthetically maim all gay people in the wake of getting them to impregnate all lesbians and utilize their prematurely ended fetal matter for undeveloped cell research. He was then going recruit the part of them and send them over to Fallujah to use as suicide bomb grub. It ran down a treat with Jerry Falwell and the Christian Coalition when all is said in done, yet he understood that persuading Utah was one thing, Ohio and Florida an alternate. 

Plan B was straightforward - vote extortion. It was simple. The greater part of the e-voting machines from Diebold had no method for a paper follow and just required a basic machine association with capture them. We should be reasonable, everyone knew passageway survey information was about as dependable as modest lowland roll and that Christian Fundies were as tricky as a wet butt nugget on a window sheet in a rainstorm. 

At last it was chosen that Plan B would work simply peachy. Karl bolted me into the White House Shite House with just fundamental procurements and my smart phone. 

The main issue was that the swamp lock snapped and I've been stuck in there for a week. Karl's a bit pissed at me however for overcompensating the apparatus a touch. Clearly he just needed a 1-2% swing. I conveyed him 10%. I'm likewise a bit stressed reason one or two society appear to have cottoned on. 

Erm.....and a couple of more e-voting outrages. 

Dubya needed to pop over to the White House for a spot of Satanic hocus pocus including giving up goats and back-leaving virgins. It's a Skull and Bones/Freemasons thing evidently to guarantee decision achievement. David Icke never quieted down about it. I think he desirous in light of the fact that he has hands like bovine's tits after they went all joint and poo when he played in objective for Coventry, in this way cutting his footballing vocation sadly short. Consequently, he truly can't hold a pen. He likewise can't wrench himself off. 

Lamentably, with George being a bit of a handle (and still horny), he got a bit stirred up amid said custom. As opposed to relinquishing the goat and ravishing a virgin, he fucked the goat utilizing virgin olive oil as lube. 

Everyone adores a man in uniform and none more so than George W. Shrubbery himself. Dubya has dependably felt that its preferable to offer over to get. We halted off at Pascagoula Naval College and he just couldn't avoid a spot of fruity playing with this hunk before he got sped off to join his mainbrace through the lower stern. 

There were bits of gossip that Karl Rove needed to get David Frum back into do Dubya's acknowledgement discourse. I said he'd presumably have three months to adjust it, however they chose they needed one for Tuesday to be safe. 

Frummie was clearly excessively occupied with doing bits and weaves for the BBC. Anyone would've thought the UK was the key swing state in this entire shaboodle. So me and George invested a bit of time tweaking and fettling a couple of old discourses to discover the best bits. 

I've simply had an email off Amanda Somebody-or-other: 

Howdy, my name is Amanda. We have talked in the past with respect to A 

Impeccable Circle's feature, "Checking Bodies Like Sheep to the Rhythm 

of the War Drum." We have recently gotten their fresh out of the plastic new feature 

for "Envision," initially composed by John Lennon. The feature is yet 

an alternate burning bit of political critique highlighting the 

shameful acts and monstrosities that right now torment the more noteworthy regular 


Tuesday, 26 February 2013


Shit is an English word that is usually considered vulgar and profane in Modern English. As a noun it refers to fecal matter (excrement) and as a verb it means to defecate or defecate in; in the plural ("the shits") it means diarrhea. Shite is also a common variant in British English and Irish English. As a slang term, it has many meanings, including: nonsense, foolishness, something of little value or quality, trivial and usually boastful or inaccurate talk, or a contemptible person. It may also be used as an expression of annoyance, surprise, or anger, and has other usages as well.

Wednesday, 25 July 2012

A Saucerful of Secrets

A Saucerful of Secrets is the second studio album by English rock group Pink Floyd. It was recorded at EMI's Abbey Road Studios on various dates from August 1967 to April 1968. It is both the last Pink Floyd album on which Syd Barrett would appear and the only studio album in which all five band members contributed.

Sunday, 31 October 2004

Dubya's Acceptance Speech

There were rumours that Karl Rove wanted to get David Frum back in to do Dubya's acceptance speech. I said he'd probably have three months to fine tune it, but they decided they wanted one for Tuesday just in case.

Frummie was obviously too busy doing bits and bobs for the BBC. Anybody would've thought the UK was the key swing state in this whole shaboodle. So me and George spent a bit of time tweaking and fettling a few old speeches to find the best bits.

The fuckers will never know.

Thursday, 21 October 2004

Imagine There's No Greater Common Populous

Take a look at my profile pic and tell me if I look like Casey fucking Casem.

I've just had an email off Amanda Somebody-or-other:

Hi, my name is Amanda. We have spoken in the past regarding A
Perfect Circle's video, "Counting Bodies Like Sheep to the Rhythm
of the War Drum." We have just received their brand new video
for "Imagine," originally written by John Lennon. The video is yet
another searing piece of political commentary highlighting the
injustices and atrocities that currently plague the greater common

Click on any of the following to watch “Imagine” off A Perfect
Circle’s album eMOTIVe. We are offering these links for you to
post on your site.





A Perfect Circle's new album, eMOTIVe, featuring both tracks, will
be released on election day, November 2.We appreciate all your
efforts in supporting the bands message and music, in this crucial
electoral climate.


I don't recall any Amanda but then again I'm normally three sheets to the wind. Also, when I'm a touch inebriated I'll promise any foxy lady anything - well she doesn't have to be that foxy, or even a girl come to think of it so long as I get me a booty grind. I'm fully aware they're justing using me to get to Dubya.

Well I can assure you I'm not about to play him this turgid lump of turd. We'll have to double the fucker's medication. The first twenty seconds is an interview with some bald twat wearing NHS specs bemoaning the fact that it won't get played on any mainstream media due to "the decline of the western civilisation - the 1984, Orwellian scenario that we're living in."

For fuck's sake - When John Lennon wrote Imagine did you see him droning inanely about Orwellian scenarios?

No. He bared his arse and went to bed for a week.

Anyway, for those of you wishing to get your shit through to Dubya, at least have the decency to try and bribe me with cash, nude pictures or a pair of used panties.